I’m done with week 5 and on to the halfway point for the first race! That’s awesome!
Also, I had a lunch date with my husband and he encouraged my lunch beers, so I’m in a more chipper mood than usual on a Sunday. Yes. This post is brought to you by craft beer and a delicious sandwich from a hollowed out loaf of bread (known as a BraiZito).
I had three runs this week, as planned. Tuesday was a 5 mile run near a Dawson Lake at Moraine View State Park. I wasn’t feeling great, but the run started 30 minutes later than usual. I set out with good intent, but aware that this course was hilly for the region and that it was late enough in the day to provide plenty of summer humidity and bugs. Then, I started to fall into step with someone I’d run with as a mentor in the past. He was mentoring the 10k group at the time and he really let me know how much my mentoring had encouraged him in the past. I suppose hearing someone actually say it made an impact on me. I felt a tinge of value in my attempts at helping people by just being who I was and saying what I meant.
Thursday was kind of nuts. I had one of “those” runs. The things I worry most about going wrong. Those were the things that went wrong. I didn’t get enough sleep overnight, so I didn’t get to run in the early AM hours like I’d planned. Dinner was later than I’d intended, so I ran sooner after eating than I would have liked. My newer headphones weren’t cooperating with the Bluetooth on my phone. The music was skipping on my run. I had a pain that I’d written off as phantom after my first stop and discovered was a hair splinter at my second. Nearly halfway into my run, I needed to eliminate and was not close enough to any bathroom to make a stop. I wound up inside of a CVS pharmacy after a rather uncomfortable jog to the building and feeling obligated to make a purchase, shoving stretchy athletic tape into the pockets of my Lucy shorts while stashing everything else into my Amphipod hydration belt and refilling my hydration in their fountain. I’d been blessed to remember to bring along knuckle lights with me since darkness set in prior to my run home from the CVS. Lights in hand, I set out for the 2 miles home. Along the way, one knuckle light completely died, leaving me with my left side illuminated and my right much less lighted along the way. A few houses from my own, I’d hit the mark I’d aimed for and started to walk. I was so thankful I’d made it the planned mileage instead of having to cut it short. Somehow, completion made it all okay. I felt more accomplished having overcome the obstacles than perhaps I had just completing the run.
Saturday was the 8 mile run that my mind was prepared for 7. I know I ran 7 last week, but my brain was not having that because I did that one on my own. The course was a 5 mile course (including the 10k group) followed by a 3 mile course. I spent much of my first 5 miles running with people training for a 10k. It was encouraging and kept me mostly close to my goal pace. Once back at the starting point [Fleet Feet store] I refilled my hydration bottles and once my hips started to stiffen up, I set back out deciding that the others I’d intended to run with would catch up with me if I’d started another warm up. They did catch up and we had an amazing run. The mentor with us spoke encouraging words when I started to feel like falling back. I followed her to the point where I was matching her footfalls to stay in my desired pace. I was actually telling myself that I had to override my mind to take my body where I wanted it to go. It worked. We finished the run near the average I’ve been looking for and someone I’d run with is willing to do the goal race with me so we can hold each other accountable. Last year, I’d had trouble with a 12 minute pace. Now, I’m closer to 10 and that’s really exciting! Mile 6 is obviously where I stopped and refilled, walked as I pleased, and recharged.
I left this week of training with hope. I’m picking up speed. I might actually PR in one of my Autumn races. I am feeling physically more able than I did in my training last year, which gives me more I in each run. I also still get to see my friends and talk to people in my training.
My depression and anxiety are not in remission. It is annoying how often I feel like my heart is beating out of my chest or that no matter how hard I try, I’m not good enough. I bash myself more than anyone ever could. I assume the world is not meant for me sometimes. I have a few close friends and I’ve discovered that it is plenty.
Thank you for reading! Please share, comment, and suggest as you please. Remember, craft beer probably had a bit to do with my writing in this particular instance. I hope you try your local brewers and you like Hazy American Pale Ale.
See you next week!